Hi, I'm Rachel. I'm a twentysomething journalist and social researcher interested in the relationship between sex, status and the self. I'm also writing a book on the topic. These are the ingredients that fuel my theories.
Check out my main blog, Musings of an Inappropriate Woman.
Click here to email me.
Elizabeth Armstrong and her colleagues conclude that women’s orgasm rates are strongly related to her evolving relationship with her partner, the activities they include, and his investment in her pleasure. Qualitative research on men’s motivations confirm the last piece. “I’m all about making her orgasm,” said a man interviewed for their study. “The general her or like the specific her?” he was asked. “Girlfriend her,” he responded, “In a hookup her, I don’t give a shit.The real reason women get off less than men and how to fix it
Instead of being driven by biology, women’s rate of orgasm relative to men is a function of social forces. For one, we often bifurcate the sexual experience in line with gender norms: men are sexual (they experience desire) and women are sexy (they inspire desire). The focus on men’s internal wants and sensations also draws our attention to his satisfaction. Thus his orgasm, but not necessarily hers, becomes a critical part of what must happen for a sexual encounter to be successful and fulfilling. This is part of why intercourse – a sexual act that is strongly correlated with orgasm for men – is the only act that almost everyone agrees counts as “real sex,” whereas activities that are more likely to produce orgasm in women are considered optional foreplay.The real reason women get off less than men and how to fix it
Freudian echoes, anatomical mischaracterizations and gender stereotypes are part of the logic naturalizing the orgasm gap, but there is nothing natural about it. We know this because women who sleep with women have many more orgasms than heterosexual women, almost as many as men who sleep with women. Women also have no problem experiencing orgasm through masturbation and the same women who frequently have orgasms during masturbation report many fewer orgasms when they’re with a partner. Men are also not faster to climax than women; it takes women the same amount of time to orgasm during masturbation as it takes men, on average, to have an orgasm through intercourse: four minutes.The real reason women get off less than men and how to fix it
These are the stories we tell ourselves about the clitoris: that women’s bodies are simply more difficult. The clitoris is hard to find and complicated to operate; it’s shy and persnickety; it disappoints its owner and mocks the efforts of her partner. And perhaps it doesn’t matter anyway, we continue, because women aren’t as interested in orgasm, right? They don’t need them like men do. They’re a more giving sex. Their pleasure is more diffuse and empathic. In any case, they’re really in it for the eye contact and the cuddling.The real reason women get off less than men and how to fix it
I’ve been asked to confirm if it’s true that women are physically incapable of orgasm before the age of 30. I’ve explained to a truly confused listener why, anatomically speaking, women are unlikely to orgasm from anal sex.The real reason women get off less than men and how to fix it
According to a large-scale survey of American adults, women have about one orgasm for every three a man enjoys. We call this the “orgasm gap” and it’s been a point of contention since feminists identified it during the heyday of the sexual revolution.The real reason women get off less than men and how to fix it
Understanding the way our biography (i.e., psychological and cultural influences) mediates our biological and sensory inputs during sex is the key to understanding our sexual experience—including our function and dysfunction, desire and frustration, anxiety and pleasure. Of course, it’s impossible to do this literally.How does your body know what feels sexy?
Why does spanking (or holding hands, or oral sex, or masturbation, or gentle love-making) make one person feel alive, while it makes another person feel dreadful? Or to put it another way, when both Mary and Sally say “spanking makes me feel dirty,” why does one smile approvingly and the other frown disapprovingly?How does your body know what feels sexy?
The number of women who are open and vocal about sexual desire, body image, and raw ambition increases every year. Female students talk openly about masturbation and porn use with a frankness and a self-acceptance that they simply didn’t 10 years ago.How teaching gender studies has changed in 20 years