March 25, 2014

Femininity is thus not the product of a choice, but the forcible citation of a norm, one whose complex historicity is indissociable from relations of discipline, regulation, punishment.

Judith Butler, Bodies that Matter (via seebster)

(Source: unrequited-rage, via materialworld)

67 notes
See Post tags #sex #femininity

repeat from NOTE TO SELF:

March 18, 2014

I know you really want to know. And I know how hard it is to find out. We search the web, we look at porn, we read self-help books and listen to podcasts. If we’re bold we ask our best friend.

Finally: Normal sex revealed

1 note
See Post tags #sex #normal

March 10, 2014

forget about trying to prove some sort of risqué bona fides, and to focus instead on all that interior whirring.

Claire Dederer

1 note
See Post tags #sex #identity #psychology #liberation

March 9, 2014

For me, the most troublesome part of Grindr has always been its proximity to commerce. In the Grindr economy, your body is your currency. You use the app to shop the catalogue of headless, shirtless torsos, to find one that you can afford (meaning someone who is at a similar fitness level). For someone like me with notorious body issues, this clearly presents a problem. But there’s also something kind of gross about it. Like emotionless and clinical. Totally the antithesis of romantic.

Have hookup apps ruined gay romance?

1 note
See Post tags #desire #sex

March 3, 2014

The Dark Power of Fraternities

See Post tags #masculinity

An asexual map for sex-positivity

1 note
See Post tags #asexuality #sex positivity #chapter 9

The Ethical Prude: Imagining An Authentic Sex-Negative Feminism

2 notes
See Post tags #sex negativity #chapter 9

February 23, 2014

The New (Gay Male) Normal » Contexts

See Post tags #sex #normal

February 16, 2014

Thus, sexology sets ‘orgasm’ up as the universal, empirical definition of sexual pleasure, and an essential component of health to which we all have a right. The asserted link between sexual fulfilment and emotional wellbeing impels us to liberate ourselves from inhibitions so that we are able to discover our ‘true selves’ through orgasmic sex (Brunt, 1982). In accordance with this sexual liberation ideology, we now have a ‘duty’ to have orgasms since experts, lovers and we ourselves expect this as a mark of ‘normal’ sexual experience. The right and duty to have orgasms reproduces what has been termed an ‘orgasmic imperative’ (an obligation) in contemporary sexual experience.

Lindy Wilbraham, 1996

See Post tags #sex #the sex myth #orgasm #performance #pleasure #chapter 2

Sexology, as a liberal approach, sees sex as transcendent of social determinants, ie ‘a universal language’. Thus, sex information and techniques are empowering of individuals: to know what-to-do and how-to-do-it diminishes anxiety and increases autonomy in sexual encounters. Constructivists argue that our experience of sexuality is bound by our class, gender, cultural/religious positions. Medicosexual knowledges are ideology-laden, then, in that they reproduce a particular (class-based) definition of sexuality and sexual relationships as ‘universal’ (LaFountaine, 1989).

Lindy Wilbraham, 1996

See Post tags #sex #the sex myth #performance #sex advice industrial complex #chapter 2